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Wednesday, Jan. 18, 2017

A lesson in humbleness and gratitude

Posted Tuesday, November 27, 2007, at 10:52 AM

Since I am an adult and have children at home for which I am solely responsible, I know how important it is for me to continuously be self-sufficient. Even when problems arise for which there seems no solutions, I expect myself to discover the solutions even if I have to search for them as if they are hidden treasures.

If I fail to discover the needed answers, then I must assume that I have not succeeded at the mission given to me by a higher power. I must admit defeat and declare my failure.

I have recently learned that the aforementioned scenario is a misconception on my part. Since I am but one human being with limited means financially, physically and mentally, I suppose it might be impossible at times for me to be completely self-sufficient. However, I still remain reluctant to rely on the help of others. I suppose this is not an entirely bad quality to have. For if I became too laxed about my self-sufficiency, it would then become easy to take advantage of the kindness of others.

I guess it is possible though for my pride to step in the way of obtaining the answers. Maybe it is pride that brings me to the thinking that I must do everything on my own. Maybe I want to discover the treasure on my own because I know that everyone else has their own special circumstances that they need to tend to. I would never want to be a burden on those close to me.

Whatever the reason, I am completely uncomfortable asking anyone, except for God, for help when I feel over-whelmed. I am also uncomfortable accepting help that is offered. As I have already mentioned, other people have woes too. I do not want to add to their already heavy burdens. It has always been my goal to help lift the burdens of those around me, not add to them.

I guess the Lord has decided that I need a lesson in humility. For I have recently found myself in a pit that I cannot seem to trudge out of on my own. Even at the bottom of the pit, I still found myself refusing offered help. Knowing my level of stubbornness, and also my desperate need, many of those who are close to me on a day to day basis joined together, unbeknownst to me, and provided for the need that my children and I had.

I must say that the actions of these kind-hearted people left me with multiple emotions. At first, I felt guilty that they had to be bothered with my problems. Then I was overcome with guilt and anger at myself because I hadn't been able to take care of this need on my own.

In the end, somebody told me that I should not feel bad about the actions of my friends. It should make me feel good to know that I have so many people who really care about me.

I guess I had no idea that so many people really did care about me and my children. I know that I am unworthy of the kind acts bestowed upon us. Maybe it is this feeling of unworthiness that causes my eyes to tear when I think about what was done for me. I didn't deserve the kindness of those around me, but they gave anyway. I will be forever grateful to them.

I truly hope that someday I will be able to give back what has been given by helping someone else who is in need. This is my daily prayer.

Since I really don't know everyone who was involved in this act of kindness, I am writing this blog hoping that all who participated will read this and understand the depth of my gratitude.

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Rayma, God works through people by touching their hearts. You are a giving special person and you do deserve Gods Blessings as well as your children. What spirit in you thinks you are unworthy? Certainly not the Holy Spirit. Pride is not one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit. My God Bless You...

-- Posted by My_2_Cents on Sat, Dec 1, 2007, at 11:54 AM

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